


Untangled

by Lyzzardbrain



Series: Thasweek [1]
Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Established Relationship, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Thasmin Week 2019 (Doctor Who)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-21
Updated: 2019-01-21
Packaged: 2019-10-13 20:01:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17494379
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lyzzardbrain/pseuds/Lyzzardbrain
Summary: Untangling yarn and memoriesThank you thasmineinlove for the prompt.





	Untangled

**Author's Note:**

> Post Witchhunters. Yaz shows her broken places.

Graham had re-taken up knitting and had quickly progressed to complex colour work and intarsia. The problem was that his yarn got terribly knotted and he got frustrated. 

Yaz and the Doctor had taken to sitting in the lounge after the men had gone to bed, sorting out the yarn. They both enjoyed the quiet time together. 

Today they had returned from King James and they were each frazzled for their own reasons. “Witch finders assistant? Did you believe that Yaz. Junior Witchfinder, because I’m a woman now. How much time did we waste today because I had to prove that I, a poor, helpless woman had to prove M’self.”

“I know it’s no fair. They just don’t know yeh”.

“Or any of the brilliant women around them. You know, when I first realized I was a woman this tune around what I said?”

“You wondered if it suited you goofball. “

“That was after I forgot. First, I just said “Brilliant”. Because it’s brilliant to be a woman. She reached up from the yarn she was working on and touched her girlfriends fingers for a moment. “Women like we are.”

They worked in amiable silence for a while. 

“Yaz, can I ask you something? You don’t have to answer. “

Yaz suspected where the Doctor might go, but felt safe enough to let her. “Try me. “

“Who was Izzy Flint”

The Doctor’s tone was so gentle, so encouraging, Yaz knew she could open up this horrible wound. Perhaps the light of the Doctor’s love could bring a hint of healing. 

“We were best mates through our tween years, did everything together. I really mean we did everything. One day she said she wanted to practise kissing, so we did. I was in love. I think she might have been to. We messed around, rubbed our boobs together, snuggled for movies. 

There was a big slumber party when we were fourteen. We played truth or dare. “. Yaz was cold, mechanical as she spoke, and the Doctor put down her yarn to drape an arm over the younger woman’s shoulder. 

“Damnit Doctor I was so naïve. They all shared who they would kiss in our school. I said I would kiss her. Half an hour before we had been snogging in the ruddy kitchen.” The Doctor was uncharacteristically quiet, bearing witness to the heartache before her. 

“She denied everything and spread rumours around the school that I had tried to feel her up. It wasn’t like that. But the school knew. I was dead inside. Nothing mattered anymore.”

The Doctor rubbed slow circles on Yaz’ back. It was enough to be present to her beloved. 

My parents were so worried. My mother finally pieces together the rumours and confronted me. We’ve patched things up since then, and she’s thrilled we are together, but that night she looked disgusted with me in a way I’ve never known before. I felt so rejected. I’ve never shown anyone this or talked about it.”

Yaz stopped, tears breaking through the cold stone of her broken grief. “I’m here for you love, if you are ready.” The Doctor had seen the scars, recognized them, but knew Yaz would share in her own time. 

“It’s the night I did this.” Yaz pulled up her shirt sleeves to show scars on her arms. 

“You were hurting a lot that night.”  
The Doctor was quiet, matter of fact.  
“I was. It was the worst day of my life.” Yaz still looked away, ashamed. 

“We’re you trying to die?” 

“I just needed to numb the pain inside with pain outside.”

The Doctor held Yaz’s arms in hers. “You are beautiful Yaz, and we all have scars, some more visible than others. I’m honoured that you’ve let me see this part of yourself. “

They finished untangling the yarn, but lay tangled together that night in limbs and sheets, broken now, but known in love’s embrace.

**Author's Note:**

> Last line comes from the Revolve song “I Heard God’s Voice”
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> **Part 1 of Thasmin Week - Hurt/Comfort**


End file.
